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[classification]

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[classification]

[ He would if he wasn't such a fucking idiot. ]

You said muss.

[douchebag]

its a fuking tpyo. autocrect is shit. u kno what i ment.

[classification]

Considering the time and your state, no, I am not positive I know what you mean.

[douchebag]

y do u thnk im liek this? for fuking fun? cant sleep. cant stay in my hous bcuz ill just thnk abt shit.

[classification]

I stopped questioning why you do the things you do a long time ago. What is it you want from me, Felix? I have tried to keep the peace between us here, but the last time we spoke that didn't seem to interest you.

[douchebag]

i dont want fuking peace. i want u.

[classification]

[ What. ]

Want me what? The way I was? That's not going to happen.

[douchebag]

jesus fuking chrits no. i told u i was sry for that and i think we prtty wel establshd ur fine without me. so what? im suposed to get over fuking dying but ur going to hold that over me fovrer?

[classification]

I'm not holding anything over you. Nor do I think you should just get over what happened. I don't know where you're coming from right now, Felix.

[douchebag]

omg. locus. ffs. I MISS YOU.

[classification]

Yes, so you've said. I can only do so much on my side of this, Felix. If you want something you have to meet me halfway.

[douchebag]

what do u want? i cant read ur mind.

[classification]

I told you already. I wanted a truce between us. That's the first step we can take.

[douchebag]

u make it sound lik were at wae.

[classification]

Weren't we? We're not exactly in the best place.

[douchebag]

whay part of dyibg horribly fuked me up sounds like i want to kil u to u?

[classification]

There's more to war than killing one another. We're both angry, Felix. That does not go away.

[douchebag]

fine.

[classification]

Fine what?

[douchebag]

fine. whatevr u wanr. hats the way itz alwyx been. why bother changing now.

[classification]

Whatever I want?! Since when? It has always been what YOU want. Your ideas, your acceptance of jobs, you doing whatever it is you felt like regardless of the consequences, your taking over where you felt I was inadequate. The only thing I have ever expressed as wanting for me AND for you, you ignored me.

Here, I was willing to put aside our differences and have a truce. For us to work together when we need to and help each other out. The last time we spoke, you threw that all back in my face because you can't seem to trust me.

So, as it stands, Isaac, I don't know what you want and can't fathom why you would miss me.

[douchebag]

[ Okay, there is just no way to respond to this with drunk fingers. Speech to text it is. God help him. ]

I did it for you. I took the jobs for you. You don't like dealing with assholes so I did it for you. It's always been for you. Fucking everything. And yeah I fucked up. Big fucking surprise. But I couldn't be like you or be whatever the fuck you actually wanted so all I could do was be what you needed.

I shouldn't have done it. I should've let you go. But I couldn't do it. I still can't fucking do it. Do you have any idea what that's like. I fucking died and I still can't get over it.

Why do I miss you? Because you're the only fucking thing that's ever made sense to me. You're all I fucking care about. I hate you for picking them. I know I know, you didn't pick them but they're alive and I'm not and at the end of the day it's their lives you put above mine. But Jesus fucking Christ I still. Fuck. I don't know how to get over it. Any of it.

[classification]

Who asked you to? I never asked you to do anything for me! I never wanted you to do anything for me. I never expected you to be like me. Yes, I wanted you to stop being so excessive sometimes and just do what we were meant to do without a show, but I never wanted or expected you to change completely. I stuck with you after the war because we were friends and partners, not because I expected anything from you. I chose you back then and remained. But, you've never trusted me, that is the problem. Yours, not mine.

I did not choose them. I chose myself. Maybe one day you will see that.

There is nothing I can do for you now. It's something only you can put to rest if you want to. Let me go or learn to trust me.

[douchebag]

[ In the morning, when he sees this whole embarrassing conversation, he's going to delete it. But he's going to save this one to remind himself of why he's never going to talk about his fucking feelings again. ]

yeah. ok locus. srry i bothred u tonite.

[classification]

[ Stop being a drama queen. ]

Keep shutting me out, Felix.

Every time I offer something you flee. I cannot fix anything on my own. You have to help.